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Tiki Central Forums Bilge The Official Tiki Central's 'Hijack This Thread" Thread.
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The Official Tiki Central's 'Hijack This Thread" Thread.
woofmutt
Tiki Socialite

Joined: Mar 26, 2002
Posts: 2605
From: Seattilite Telstar
Posted: 2008-10-06 07:01 am   Permalink

I see yer BEAT OFF and raise yuh a BONER...






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woofmutt
Tiki Socialite

Joined: Mar 26, 2002
Posts: 2605
From: Seattilite Telstar
Posted: 2009-03-07 10:12 pm   Permalink

Even my vague rant felt too pointed. Yet here I am saying something nonetheless. Yes, I am an asshole. But I've known that since 1986.
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KuKu
Tiki Socialite

Joined: May 07, 2008
Posts: 436
From: Santa Cruz, CA. norcal
Posted: 2009-03-08 09:48 am   Permalink

Dig down deep, wallop the polyp, then look me in the eye...


 
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tiki-riviera
Tiki Socialite

Joined: May 11, 2003
Posts: 661
From: Long Beach
Posted: 2009-03-09 12:08 am   Permalink



It's itchy, scratchy and it's spreading. Is that bad?




 
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woofmutt
Tiki Socialite

Joined: Mar 26, 2002
Posts: 2605
From: Seattilite Telstar
Posted: 2009-03-09 01:23 am   Permalink

"It's itchy, scratchy and it's spreading. Is that bad?"

The itch and scratch could mean you're allergic to wool. The spreading means your wife (God rest her shark ravaged soul in the briny deep) probably didn't use the right hooks when crocheting the sweater. A controlled wash in hot water might stop the spreading by causing some shrinking in the yarn. It's worked for me with sweaters that kept spreading. But if you do it wrong you could end up with a thick felt pot holder.
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Chip and Andy
Tiki Socialite

Joined: Jul 13, 2004
Posts: 2215
From: Corner table, Molokai Lounge, Mai-Kai.
Posted: 2009-03-09 04:35 am   Permalink

Quote:

[ But if you do it wrong you could end up with a thick felt pot holder.



I remember the horror that was the classroom that day..... all of us weaving our little pot holders on those tiny plastic looms. It was all giggles and smiles until the rain set in.


 
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woofmutt
Tiki Socialite

Joined: Mar 26, 2002
Posts: 2605
From: Seattilite Telstar
Posted: 2009-03-09 08:00 am   Permalink

Which reminds me of my first trip to San Francisco one spring break. Of course we went to "the Haight" as the old folks who though they were kids called it. I dunno why we hadda go see the place. I never liked the Grateful Dead nor was I intrigued by all the tie dye wearing pot holders weaving along the sidewalk or asking for spare change.


Here's my idea of a good pot holder:





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Chip and Andy
Tiki Socialite

Joined: Jul 13, 2004
Posts: 2215
From: Corner table, Molokai Lounge, Mai-Kai.
Posted: 2009-03-09 10:42 am   Permalink

Quote:

Here's my idea of a good pot holder:




After watching the road-side signs for what seemed like the last forever the freeway exit sign looms large in the windshield. Wanton anticipation finally breaks into visible excitement as the twists and turns in the road keep the neon sign just out of sight, just around the next corner. Not only do I really have to pee, but I finally get to see the Home of the Cup Flipper!


 
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tiki-riviera
Tiki Socialite

Joined: May 11, 2003
Posts: 661
From: Long Beach
Posted: 2009-03-09 2:11 pm   Permalink



Speaking of pot holders, you know what I really hate? You find a store you've never seen before, and it's selling everything you've dreamed of for amazing prices. You buy everything you want and can't believe your good fortune. You return the next day to buy more, only to find the store is gone and an empty lot in it's place. In the middle of the lot is an Indian warrior sitting on a pure white Stallion, he looks at you and speaks "you are the chosen one to lead the people to freedom and safety, wear this talisman and you'll be protected from all Evil" to which I reply "shut up you friggin idiot, what the hell happened to the store?"


 
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little lost tiki
Tiki Socialite

Joined: Jun 12, 2006
Posts: 7594
From: Orange,CA-right near the Circle!
Posted: 2009-03-09 3:42 pm   Permalink

i know a few good pot-holders....
and they're holding!


 
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woofmutt
Tiki Socialite

Joined: Mar 26, 2002
Posts: 2605
From: Seattilite Telstar
Posted: 2009-03-09 6:48 pm   Permalink

I was going past a vacant lot today and saw this Indian warrior with a single tear trickling down his cheek. I felt kinda bad and wondered if he'd seen me dumping a fridge, four old tires, and last year's Xmas tree in the lot. But now I know it was Tiki-Thunderbird who made him cry. Jeez. What a jerk.
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tiki-riviera
Tiki Socialite

Joined: May 11, 2003
Posts: 661
From: Long Beach
Posted: 2009-03-09 7:53 pm   Permalink



The Indian warrior was crying because he was hungry, so I went back to my tent and filled my flashlight with beans and took it to him. Woofmutt almost let a Indian warrior starve to death. Just because Custer was your great great great uncle is no excuse.


 
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KuKu
Tiki Socialite

Joined: May 07, 2008
Posts: 436
From: Santa Cruz, CA. norcal
Posted: 2009-03-10 4:31 pm   Permalink

I like pie, can woofmutt get us free custard pie...?

 
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woofmutt
Tiki Socialite

Joined: Mar 26, 2002
Posts: 2605
From: Seattilite Telstar
Posted: 2009-03-11 11:17 pm   Permalink

Is this love is this love is this love is this love that I'm feeling?

From the Myspace in box:

Hello Am tammy by name am from germany berlin single ,never married and dont have kids also,am here to seek for my soulemate lover,that understanding man ,well i am sorry that i dont have pics on my profile,but i tryed to upload my pics and it did not laod up,so if u care to get to know more about me and we can share pics and get to know ourselfs,you can email me on (...) or (...) we talk more,well no one knows how True love comes and No one knows when it comes,why not give it a try and never loose Hope.
Thanks Am online Now.
Tammy.



To those of you who would dismiss this with a reference to a salty canned meat product I'd like to remind you of Tammy By Name's words... "...No one knows how True love comes and No one knows when it comes,why not give it a try and never loose Hope."

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tiki-riviera
Tiki Socialite

Joined: May 11, 2003
Posts: 661
From: Long Beach
Posted: 2009-03-12 2:17 pm   Permalink

Quote:

On 2009-03-11 23:17, woofmutt wrote:
Is this love is this love is this love is this love that I'm feeling?

From the Myspace in box:

Hello Am tammy by name am from germany berlin single ,never married and dont have kids also,am here to seek for my soulemate lover,that understanding man ,well i am sorry that i dont have pics on my profile,but i tryed to upload my pics and it did not laod up,so if u care to get to know more about me and we can share pics and get to know ourselfs,you can email me on (...) or (...) we talk more,well no one knows how True love comes and No one knows when it comes,why not give it a try and never loose Hope.
Thanks Am online Now.
Tammy.



To those of you who would dismiss this with a reference to a salty canned meat product I'd like to remind you of Tammy By Name's words... "...No one knows how True love comes and No one knows when it comes,why not give it a try and never loose Hope."






I emailed her and she sent me pics.. WOW! She is beautiful, I think we're soulemate lovers..this is my
reward for never loose hope:)




 
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