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Dinking at Office X-mas parties? Yes No? |
Gigantalope
Tiki Socialite
Joined: Aug 01, 2004
Posts: 913
From: Shinola, California
|  Posted: 2004-12-16 6:53 pm Permalink
And if you have a story to tell...please do
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cybertiki
Tiki Socialite
Joined: Jun 28, 2003
Posts: 234
From: Fort Lauderdale, FL
| Posted: 2004-12-16 7:10 pm Permalink
Yes ... many years ago (early 80s) we had a killer office party during which I got everyone so sauced that they didn't even notice when I ground up the lid of my blender in the drinks. They just drank it anyway. Larry Murphy (God rest his soul) left early and managed to get pulled over doing a blazing 12 MPH in the high speed lane on 128 that goes around Boston. Fortunately, the cop who pulled him over was his neighbor, and after putting him in the back seat of the cruiser, parked Larry's car in the breakdown lane, and took Larry home to his wife where he was severely beaten. She then she called me at the office and screamed at me for about a half hour. By that time I was too drunk to care, so put the phone on speaker and let her rip while we laughed our asses off.
That was the day I got home, and found someone parked in my space at the apartment complex; I broke into their car, and with the assistance of a friend pushed it up into the high speed lane of the highway.
Now, I work from a home office and can (do) drink for XMas - as well as most of the rest of the Holiday's (including Arbor Day, Groundhog Day, Elvis' BDay, the Equinoxes and Solstices, Halloween, Easter, and most of the other's too). St. Patrick's is about the best since it's the also the only holiday where I can puke green and tell the Lovely Joelle that it was because I ate the vegetables that she claims are good for me.
Yes, I know drinking kills brain cells, but they're all gonna die at some point anyway. At least this way I get to say goodbye to them a few at a time.
Cheers!
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They eat liars with the same enthusiasm as they eat honest men.
http://www.cybertiki.com
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KuKuAhu
Tiki Socialite
Joined: Dec 23, 2002
Posts: 567
From: Kahiki, Ohio
| Posted: 2004-12-16 11:02 pm Permalink
Quote:
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On 2004-12-16 19:10, cybertiki wrote:
Yes, I know drinking kills brain cells, but they're all gonna die at some point anyway. At least this way I get to say goodbye to them a few at a time.
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Ah, parting is such sweet sorrow. Especially when it has a pineapple spear in it.
Ku Ku
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tikifish
Tiki Socialite
Joined: Mar 25, 2002
Posts: 2720
From: Toronto,Canada
| Posted: 2004-12-17 10:10 am Permalink
I'm not really one for DINKING at office parties, but I really enjoy DRINKING at office parties!
You know what they say... don't dip your pen in company ink!
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cynfulcynner
Tiki Socialite
Joined: Mar 24, 2002
Posts: 1800
From: Ocean Beach, San Francisco
| Posted: 2004-12-17 10:19 am Permalink
Fill The Bars With Christmas Drinking
Fa-La-La-La-La La-La-La-La
See The People Getting Stinking
Fa-La-La-La-La La-La-La-La
Though Their Brains Are Half Corroded
Fa-La-La-La-La La-La-La-La
Still They'll Try To Drive Home Loaded
Fa-La-La-La-La La-La-La-La
See The Busy Intersection
Fa-La-La-La-La La-La-La-La
Here Come Cars From Each Direction
Fa-La-La-La-La La-La-La-La
See The Pile-Up When They're Meeting
Fa-La-La-La-La La-La-La-La
What A Novel Christmas Greeting
Fa-La-La-La-La La-La-La-La
Hear The Sounds Of Sirens Blowing
Fa-La-La-La-La La-La-La-La
See The Yuletide Death Toll Growing
Fa-La-La-La-La La-La-La-La
That's The Fate Of Drunken Drivers
Fa-La-La-La-La La-La-La-La
Sing This Song To The Survivors
Fa-La-La-La-La La-La-La-La
(originally published in MAD magazine, 1973)
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dangergirl299
Grand Member (first year) 
Joined: Feb 18, 2003
Posts: 893
From: Bay Area
| Posted: 2004-12-17 11:34 am Permalink
I work for a law firm, so with the combined brain power of those cats, our x-mas "party" is a luncheon, where you have to go to work after, and it's not going to last long hours - people tend to drink less during the day, especially when they have to go back to work after... although that hasn't always stopped me!!!
but I plan on bringing into work the next 2 thursdays (our last half days before the respective holidays) a bottle of my infused lemon vodka (the lemons were brought in by a secretary) and ice and tonic water; for people to have a nip before they leave for the day. as discussed at the all female work cookie exchange party last night, the champagne in the morning provided with our annual pancake, bacon & eggs breakfast at work is hardly consumed - what a waste! could be because people still have to work after.
keep that in mind if you're ever hosting an open bar event - it will be a lot cheaper if you do it at breakfast or lunch time!
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CruzinTiki
Tiki Socialite
Joined: Apr 13, 2003
Posts: 215
From: Santa Cruz, CA
| Posted: 2004-12-17 8:34 pm Permalink
I'd have to give the drinking at the office party question a big YES. We had our company party last week and my boss was sauced by the time we arrived. At one point in the evening the bartender was missing so he went behind the bar and started pouring us all shots from some mucho expensivo top shelf tequila. His wife is eight months pregnant and he spent the latter part of the evening telling us all how "smokin' HOT" her OBGYN is -- my husband said that was like every man's fantasy. Don't worry, his injuries are healing nicely.
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RevBambooBen
Tiki Socialite
Joined: Nov 12, 2002
Posts: 7197
From: Huntikington Beach
| Posted: 2004-12-17 8:45 pm Permalink
Dinking at Office X-mas parties? Yes No?
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What's an office??
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Tiki_Bong
Deleted
Joined: Mar 25, 2002
Posts: 0 | Posted: 2004-12-17 10:36 pm Permalink
Quote:
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On 2004-12-17 20:45, RevBambooBen wrote:
Dinking at Office X-mas parties? Yes No?
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What's an office??
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No Ben, they said "oriface"
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"I'm ashamed to be here, but not too ashamed to leave..."
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FreakBear
Tiki Socialite
Joined: Apr 15, 2004
Posts: 361
From: Springfield, Ohio
| Posted: 2004-12-17 11:53 pm Permalink
Quote:
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On 2004-12-17 22:36, Tiki_Bong wrote:
No Ben, they said "oriface"
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Giving is better than recieving!
-FB
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Unga Bunga
Tiki Socialite
Joined: Jun 06, 2003
Posts: 5734
From: CaliTikifornia
| Posted: 2004-12-18 12:46 pm Permalink
Office Christmas Party:
After the annual office Christmas party blow-out, John woke up with a pounding headache, cotton-mouthed, and utterly unable to recall the events of the preceding evening. After a trip to the bathroom he was able to make his way downstairs, where his wife put some coffee in front of him. "Louise," he moaned, "tell me what went on last night. Was it as bad as I think?"
"Even worse," she assured him in her most scornful one. "You made a complete ass of yourself, succeeded in antagonizing the entire board of directors, and insulted the chairman of the company to his face."
"He's an arrogant, self-important prick, piss on him!"
"You did. All over his suit, " Louise informed him. "And he fired you."
"Well, fuck him," said John.
"I did. You're back at work on Monday."
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dangergirl299
Grand Member (first year)
Joined: Feb 18, 2003
Posts: 893
From: Bay Area
| Posted: 2004-12-20 11:53 am Permalink
Quote:
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On 2004-12-18 12:46, Unga Bunga wrote:
Office Christmas Party:
After the annual office Christmas party blow-out, John woke up with a pounding headache, cotton-mouthed, and utterly unable to recall the events of the preceding evening. After a trip to the bathroom he was able to make his way downstairs, where his wife put some coffee in front of him. "Louise," he moaned, "tell me what went on last night. Was it as bad as I think?"
"Even worse," she assured him in her most scornful one. "You made a complete ass of yourself, succeeded in antagonizing the entire board of directors, and insulted the chairman of the company to his face."
"He's an arrogant, self-important prick, piss on him!"
"You did. All over his suit, " Louise informed him. "And he fired you."
"Well, fuck him," said John.
"I did. You're back at work on Monday."
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related joke:
man wakes up after a bender. can't remember anything but normally after coming home after a bender, he wakes up in the garage, freezing cold and locked out of the house by his angry wife.
however, this morning he woke up in bed. the house was quiet and the heater was on. a tray of breakfast foods and coffee was waiting for him next to the bed.
he saw one of his kids walk by the door and called him in.
"what happened last night - I don't remember."
the kid said "you came home late last night and while mom was taking off your pants to put you to bed you said 'back off lady - I'm married!'"
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